Happy Valentine’s Day!

Happy Valentine’s Day! —

Whether you’re happily single,  newly paired, married for a zillion years, or looking for a partner,  I wanted to share my article on

Five Ways to Bring Love Back to Valentine’s Day

Remember… love isn’t something other people give you (not even if they have roses or really awesome chocolates)  it’s in you always… it IS you… always…

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Magical Twilight; card of the week 19th January 2016

card 1.19.2016

 

This i-Ching hexagram #36  sometimes called “twilight” or  “darkening of the light” relates to a similar theme we saw last week (don’t rush into motion, there might not be anything you can DO) and the re-view, re-negotiate, and be thoughtful themes of this month’s  mercury retrograde.   “Twilight” speaks of an especially fortunate time for  continuing to guard steady, amazing progress by sticking to our personal integrity and letting go instead of leaping into fevered motion.

When the twilight comes it’s a magical time of evening with fireflies glowing and stars beginning to shine.   But it’s also a time between rest and motion when visibility is low and when  not all the little day-creatures have found their safe nests.   Bound by day and night, the land between these two worlds creates the need for caution and consideration.     After all, you don’t want to be the day-mouse darting around haphazardly  under the watchful eyes of a night owl.

(this picture painted on a tiny wooden disc makes it hard to see – but there’s a little mouse peeking out of a hole)

This week, appreciate the beauty of the transitional energy underway.  Count the fireflies and stars, but be mindful about what you’re doing. Don’t get lured out of your nest before the time is right and don’t scurry without direction or a flashlight.  Even if you find yourself going to lots of social engagements, you’ll do best if you keep yourself grounded in your own immovable core as you have a good time or as you bring your wisdom and friendship to those who are having a tough go.

This week is not about dimming your PERSONAL light or living in the dark!   In fact,  this is a great week to think about ways in which you can stay true to yourself  without getting all caught up in what’s going on.  If you’re true to yourself  then your light can really shine the way it’s meant to and you’ll have way more fun that way.

Twilight hexagram is also about not always going along with what’s popular.     Conventional thinking  could lead you down a road that is just not YOU. The masses can be right about a lot of things but there’s also time when the conventional wisdom around you might suggest the most basic “little me” ego way to see the world – for example:    —   don’t try to understand another person’s pain or experience – ditch ‘em!  — don’t think about what role you played in things, blame someone else!  You shouldn’t have to be kind or loving, the person in the wrong should do it!

Think twice before you let what’s popular or common  define your direction.    You might even  find yourself swimming against the Zeitgeist this week.   Think about all those scientists who were laughed at; of Copernicus who had the crazy notion that the Earth revolves around the sun, and how very much AGAINST the grain of popular thinking that once was.

Yes, the  twilight brings dimmer light and with it, it’s harder to see far ahead and harder to connect the dots and see how everything fits together but sometimes it’s not important to see how it all fits and to trust the Heavens in their sparkling, infinite array of stars and potential ahead.   You’re safe, you’re you and you have an important light to bring to the world!

 

Have a great week!

About this deck: I made this oracle many years ago using wooden discs painted with wood pencils, varnish, and wood enamels.       It is inspired by the  I-CHING  or “Book of Changes” dating back to end of the second millennium BCE, it’s also one of the oldest books in recorded history.     The I-Ching comprises a set of 64 hexagrams (6 lines each)  which  represent all the possible six-line combinations  of yin/yang energy.   Yin and Yang energy are the dualistic building blocks of the universe;  feminine/masculine, active/passive, light/dark, etc.     Each hexagram is made up of two of the 8 “Hua” Trigrams that represent the classical  fundamental elements and which were said, in legend, to have been inspired when the first  Emperor of China Fu Hsi had visions related to the lines and dashes on a turtle’s back.   Because of some of the legends surrounding it, scholars believe some of the “I-Ching” material pre dates recorded history in Ancient China.

Electric Blue Moons; Card of the Week 11th January 2016

 

card 1.11.2016

 

 

 

This week’s card, Impatience (Electric Moon) from Tori Hartman’s Chakra Wisdom Oracle cards is so interesting because a lot of folks seem to be experiencing a huge influx of “I want to do it….and do it all… right now!” energy that came in with the New Year.   There’s lots of things pending and lots of sources of both positive and seemingly negative anxiety sources and we want to barrel through it all at once and get it  done.     Thankfully, this isn’t a feeling I get very often (I’m usually more on the methodical-tree-sloth-molasses end of the energy spectrum)   but boy have I been zapped with it this week.

Each image in this deck has an associated spiritual fable by Tori Hartman and her spiritual guides and in one, our protagonist Etan can’t wait for the dawn so he decides to figure out a way to light up the night sky even though the Sky God assures him that the dawn will come, and the sun will come back up…. and he does it with a used (electric) moon. Unfortunately, the electric moon doesn’t work out that great, and like the old rabbit-ear TV’s of the 70s, it just wouldn’t stay lit unless he is holding the cord.   Even though the Sky God tells him to let go,  let go of that cord,  that the dawn will come….

*spoiler alert***  does the sun come up and does dawn arrive? Yes it does!

It’s tempting to want to leap into action or to take shortcuts (or seeming shortcuts) to make something we want come sooner or to make it all seem to be under our control, but this simply isn’t always possible.   This week, thinking and making decisions from a mental or emotional landscape of “I don’t have enough, I don’t have it when I want it” won’t go very well.  Hasty decisions, rush jobs, or MacGyvering electric moons aren’t going to light the way any faster.   It’s time to trust the dawn, let go of the cord, and slow down.

This is a good week to work in service of the Mercury Retrograde (“re-think, re-organise, re-view”) fairies and to remember that the dawn is a wonderful, awesome, revealing and successful time coming for you!

 

About this deck:    Tori Hartman’s Chakra Wisdom Oracle is illustrated by Gretchen Raisch-Baskin and it’s a fabulous re-tooling of the Colour Wisdom oracle.  We’re back to weekly cards –   and some new features and changes will be happening on the page in coming weeks.  I’ll be reintroducing deck reviews and book reviews and changing some features around as I plan to change the blog and main site too.  (astronomy page and other side pages will be back in a new form)

How to Make Changes and New Year Resolutions Stick for Good

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Happy New Year, everyone!  I can’t believe we’re almost a week into the brand new year. It’s going to be an awesome one!

A week ago or so, a lot of us started to reflect on the past year and think of what we want to accomplish in the New Year.  There’s tons of articles out now about setting New Year’s resolutions (and even whether doing that is a good idea or not) and it’s generally a time where people are geared up for “new habits” and thinking about the themes they want to change.

And you know what happens next; all those good intentions, the containers from the Container Store, the new gym trainers, the new juicer and the new notebook for writing down household expenses, all gather dust in our guilt-closet before March if we’re not careful.

If you’ve done the most important part (listening to your own heart about what needs to change in your life, or what you’d love to create)  here’s some things I’ve learned about making the energy of change and creativity into NEW habits instead of just “resolutions”  –

 

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Big elephant, small bites

How do you eat a life-sized chocolate elephant? One bite at a time.

The biggest obstacle to making any new change is that seemingly insurmountable gap between the big dream (“Be a better person”  “Lose weight” “Move on from ex”  “Quit smoking”) and real results.  We’re often stymied when it comes to figuring out how to make nebulous or big plans reality.  In this case, the chocolate elephant in the room is your dreams, goals and visions.   You will need both big dreams and small bites to finish the job.   A big dream is a goal, an end-game, something you desire to attain for yourself in the long run.  Smaller “bites” are that big dream broken down into doable tasks that you do every day, which will add up to attaining your goal.

Small bites may not seem like much, but they’re just as important as the big dreams. Your mind needs a way to see that there are doable things you can do to make those visions concrete. Waiting for something to magically manifest won’t help, and sitting there looking at that huge chocolate elephant can cause you to give up before you even take a single bite.

Let’s say your big goal is to “be organized”, this instruction is so undefined and huge that you’ll never want to tackle it.  Small bites, on the other hand, can make the goal feel like a reality right now.   A small bite is your specific, small (remember it has to be doable!) action you’ll do today:

This morning I’m going to recycle all the magazines and take-out menus that aren’t current.

Create a small bite  objective for each big goal, each day… the smaller the better:

Today I’m going to create a mail centre with envelopes, stamps and a place to put incoming mail, and outgoing mail,  for example.

As those small bites add up, and the victory you feel when you accomplish them will help you be excited and creative about making new ones as the daunting task seems smaller and more manageable.   If you have trouble figuring out a small, doable task, find a book related to the goal you want to achieve.  A book can give you lots of ideas about actions you can take and you can invent your own.

 

Use your current habits

We’re creatures of habit, so why not use existing ingrained routines to get started on new ones?   New habits simply need repetition to become set and what better way than to use things you do each day already.

Use existing habits as a basis for your small-bite action goals wherever possible.  For example, if you want add extra steps to your pedometer, you can use a quick daily walk that is already a habit for you (to and from your car, your path to work) and make it a bit longer each day.  If you want to keep your briefcase tidy, associate a new habit with something you do already:
When I plop my briefcase on the table tonight, I’ll take out the papers and items I don’t need for tomorrow.
If you cook dinner at home every night, use this meal to create a new dietary habit instead of forcing yourself to make diet lunches:
For dinner tonight, I’ll make a dish with greens and whole grains

There’s no need to reinvent the wheel.  If you exercise in the evening already, then dreaming up a new scheme to wake up at the crack of dawn to go to the gym might be counter-productive for you.

Making defined, specific times to do your tasks and small-bite actions will help you introduce new habits to your routine and follow through.

The human brain builds synaptic connections and strengthens the efficiency of neurons in tasks that it does routinely. Synaptic “pruning” helps us put more energy into the things that we practice and do often by pruning away and eliminating connections we don’t use very often. Making new habits pair with existing strong connections helps you incorporate them faster.

The ivy effect

As an ivy plant grows, it senses progress and produces new cells which create tendrils, leaves and shoots. When the ivy comes in contact with objects, it alters its root structure to climb trees, and even walls. The more it grows, the better it can climb.  Your new habits and changes are just like that ivy, constantly building a bigger system and structure.  Seeing the results of your effort build an unbroken streak every day can be amazingly effective to help you keep going.  Use an app, calendar, journal or wipe board to keep track of your “streak”.    Each time you do your daily small-bite task, create a check mark.

It sounds silly but it works. Seinfeld’s famous “habit chain” operates on this same principle. When Jerry Seinfeld was a rising comedian, he knew that he’d have to consistently develop new jokes. To keep at it, even when he wasn’t in the mood, he took a giant wall calendar and marked a red “x” on the date whenever he achieved his goal of writing every day. When he saw those “x” marks adding up like links in a chain, he was inspired to keep going.

If you’re into technology – there’s a ton of apps for tracking habits and reinforcing patterns so there’s sure to be one that works for you.  I’ve tried a few that have reminders like “Fabulous: Motivate Me!” for Android…  but I have found a visual representation of progress works best so using an app on my phone to write all over a pdf calendar page lets me see a string of habits collect.

 

Cut the distractions

The best way to create changes and new routines is to make your environment less cluttered with distraction.  Simplify wherever you can and make the items you need for your goal easy to reach and get to.
For months my goal of having a tidy house was thwarted by my bathroom vanity.   Somehow, in spite of my best intentions, it became a repository for old receipts, coins, empty jars, products, and other junk.   It was a disorganized mess and it was difficult to keep clean.

Finally, I decided to place out only those items I used every day out on the vanity and shelves nearby… nothing else!   Something strange happened immediately. Without effort, I kept the entire vanity neat as a pin, with items put away properly and the vanity and sink wiped down every day.  (I realized that all that clutter had made me give up and let junk land where it may.)  Being able to find things fast, when I needed them, was the reward that kept my habit going.

Be here now

Failure starts with unrealistic expectations and living in the future instead of the present.   Maybe you want to have a healthier diet and daydream about being skinny and having lots of romantic attention from partners who find the new, slimmer you irresistible.  But when you look in the mirror, it’s not happening fast enough and you beat yourself up for still being chubby, and because you don’t have six-pack abs and you can’t cook a gourmet twelve course raw feast, you give up on yourself and have a basket of French fries.

I have a long list of failed New Year’s resolutions in years past with crazy stuff like, “learn to read Ovid’s Metamorphosis in Latin,”  or,  “make all my food from scratch”  perfectly reasonable, creative goals for someone… but for me they just gathered failure dust because I didn’t create an expectation (learn more words in Latin, make some meals at home..)  that I could actually DO.   At the end of the day,  we can only do what matters to our heart in the PRESENT.

Instead of this defeating, demoralizing pattern of expecting instant results or living in fantasy imagination of the future, put your energy and focus on what you are doing today to attain your goals.   Be patient with yourself and tell yourself you’re doing a good job right here in the present.   Have your goals in mind, but focus on the small-bites and immediate tasks far more than anything in the future.   You will absolutely see progress if you stay grounded in the present.  If you slip up, the present moment is always a new beginning.

 

 

*article adapted from my article “Making New Years Resolutions Stick” Psychic Guidepost magazine

Delights and delights; Card of the Week 28th December 2015

card 12.28.2015

 

I hope everyone reading things had a wonderful holiday filled with love, light and peace!   December is my busiest month in all the things I do (art and other work too)  so I haven’t really been able to blog in my usual way.   In January though, it will be back to business more-as-usual.

This week’s card is a sweet one.  As much as we’re having a time of focusing (or re-focusing) on practical matters; bills that need attention, diet that needs to be re-stabilised after the holidays, keeping in touch with loved ones –  this week’s card reminds us to not be so caught up in things that we can’t have some times of simple delight.

This is not a week to do everything or try to wrap up everything in a neat tidy box, or go into post-holiday “must fix everything” obsession mode.    It’s good to clean up, and there’s even energy flowing that is going to help us be productive … but easy does it.  There’s still time to take a few moments to appreciate wonderment, to share a few tender moments with loved ones or even visit a new place.

Even though the party/holiday/festivities season is starting to wind down, this is a time when there are still some fun festivities to be enjoyed. If you do end up being busy, or focused on a project, take time to savour small delights and find them shining and glimmering alongside the must-dos and have-tos that are cropping up this week.

Not every delight is a glitzy experience,  or a package wrapped in a bow.  Some of the most delightful things are simple or unexpected. And if your holiday shopping is over, there’s still opportunities for you to CREATE delight this week too.  There’s more giving and sharing that you could inspire others with this week.

 

About this deck: The Original Angel Cards: Inspirational Messages and Meditations by Kathy Tyler and Joy Drake is a set of 72 playfully illustrated, tiny cards for inspiration, creativity, meditation and more.  It is published by Allegro Corporation.

Easy Goes it; Card of the Week, 14th December 2015

card 12.14.2015

Two cards this week  (including  one “jumper”)   and they go so perfectly together and are great clues about how to be our most giving and receptive selves.

Being easy going is something the adult, productive, disciplined get-things-done side of ourselves doesn’t usually embrace, but that skill is  plays a huge role in  things coming to us easily!  You can get more done, see more opportunities, and be more receptive if you let go a little bit.

This week being flexible might be a necessity.  December is an intense energy month and an intense time when a lot of people celebrate holidays and there’s more “hubbub” happening than normal. There are parties to go to, food to make, presents to wrap, family to deal with… and even if you don’t do any of those things, you have to deal with the people who do.    Things might not go the way you originally think or hope that they will.   Being flexible will let you roll with what’s going on and get things done anyway.

No matter what the situation, not expecting things to be a certain way can help you embrace things as they are and that can help you enjoy yourself a lot more.  For example, we don’t always get the wonderful family and friends of TV sit-coms, we get the human, flawed ones we’ve got.   Not every gift or meal can be Martha Stewart-esque and not every get together is going to be like a Hallmark movie where everyone hugs and sings at the end.   But, some of the very  best things come out of imperfection.

Playfulness sees innocence where our reasoning minds are hardened and practical.  Playfulness is not only about having fun but also in seeing the humour in every day things.  One of my favourite winter/holiday memories is of a terrible blizzard that hit one year as we planned to visit an out of state aunt.   What began as a huge disappointment ended up being a snow-fort building, hot-chocolate making, casserole building great time.

The best way to RECEIVE (and give) is to not have a rigid and inflexible idea about how things should be. This week, budge and give a little bit. Be playful, let life surprise you, make messy but delicious cookies and do something unexpected.    Or maybe you can shake things up and introduce a little bit of flexibility and fun to your family and friends.

Have a great week!

About this deck: The Original Angel Cards: Inspirational Messages and Meditations by Kathy Tyler and Joy Drake is a set of 72 playfully illustrated, tiny cards for inspiration, creativity, meditation and more.  It is published by Allegro Corporation.

Openness; Card of the Week, 7th December 2015

 

card 12.7.2015

This month’s theme is about giving and sharing, and this week’s card is a great reminder of one of the best gifts we can give to ourselves and others: OPENNESS

Sounds great… but what exactly is openness?   Openness manifests in all sorts of different ways but it always does one thing:  invites energy IN instead of repelling it.

Think of someone with an open mind willing to listen to your side of the story, or think about how some people feel really open and accepting and have open, friendly faces instead of pinched, closed or angry ones.   Or what about the person who is open to ideas?  Openness is all about having an open and willing heart.

Why is that so important? Because if we are going to get what we want (new relationships, jobs, opportunities, abundance, etc.) openness is required to attract what we want and to take the practical steps needed to make progress.  If you’re not open, after all, you’re going to feel that energy manifest as boredom, frustration, pessimism, feeling hopeless, lost, agitated, antsy, or dull.

Giving the gift of openness is a great way to increase your OWN open heart or help yourself open up if you’re feeling closed down or pinched up.   Spend a little time this week brainstorming about how you feel when you’re open and how you have given that openness to other people in the past.  Next, think about some ways that you could give the gift of openness to others and yourself.

Maybe for you that means being really open with your spouse and having a great conversation. Maybe you’ll decide that being frustrated is holding you back and you want to give yourself permission to wiggle your toes in the sand and just be open to whatever is coming, whenever it comes. Maybe you’ll open your wallet or heart or kitchen to someone who needs you this week.  Maybe you’ll open yourself up to the possibility of having fun doing something totally different than your normal routine.  Maybe you’ll open yourself to possibilities you haven’t known or seen yet.

Being open means you’re not focusing on what hasn’t worked before, or on  the timeline or manner that your mind suggests, but rather that you’re up for what’s coming without judgements or preconceptions about what that will be.   I hope you get and GIVE the gift of openness this week Smile

 

About this deck: The Original Angel Cards: Inspirational Messages and Meditations by Kathy Tyler and Joy Drake is a set of 72 playfully illustrated, tiny cards for inspiration, creativity, meditation and more.  It is published by Allegro Corporation.